Santa Claus Quoted My Hernia

Did you hear Betty Crocker
fucked that Gandalf fucker?
Not once but twice
a threesome with Vanilla ice.
It sounds pretentious
and delightfully obnoxious.
Can you blame Quentin Tarantino
for playing footsie with Mr. Burrito?
Robert California sued Red Lobster
for violating his prostate hamster.
Shia labeouf quoted Mr. Bungle
as being the next funk jazz pop bubble.
So, what am I? Forest Gump
Or, a hernia R&B lump.


Copyright © 2020 Charlie Zero the Poet

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29 thoughts on “Santa Claus Quoted My Hernia

    1. Spot on exactly. 🙂

      That was the whole point of the poem. And I was really bored when I wrote it. It just came out of nowhere. 🙂

      Yes, everything is okay. Not the mention…I officially made an (Instagram) account and I’ve joined a collective poetic group on their. Big supportive and very encouragement.

  1. I have to quote the whole last section of lines. Phenomenal. – “Robert California sued Red Lobster / for violating his prostate hamster. / Shia labeouf quoted Mr. Bungle / as being the next funk jazz pop bubble. / So, what am I? Forest Gump / Or, a hernia R&B lump.”

    1. 🙂 So glad those lines made your day. And hope the poem made you laugh hard. 🙂 hahahaha!!! more to come my friend. 🙂 It’s been a long while since I rhymed poetically. I only experimented with it before and that’s it. I’ll be posting two more rhyme poems and that’s it. I prefer writing free verse/cut up experimentation. 🙂

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