Lamas Dipped in Vagisil & Amish

 

Harpo Marx used a pizza wagon
to lure Ariel, John Hinckley,
& Lamas.
He takes them home
for soup recipes
and creates a dipping sauce
called: “Vagisil & Amish.”
Cosmo Kramer
you penny pincher scallop –
make love to the wall pervert.
Macaulay Culkin
does impressions
of KFC & Jheri curls.
Just ask Mariah Carey –
she’s a marine rectumologist,
she’s Danny DeVito’s pacifier.

Raphael wiggum,
are you rabieist? No!
Good, because imitating
Tupac Shakur is considered bronchitis.
Pineapples & Sharon Tate
tough to choose, I’ll pick…

Meredith brooks vs. Cinnamon toast crunch.
I’d love to see a Dave Chappelle skit –
involving Sammy Davis Jr. as Doctor Satan the pimp
and Mickey Rourke as Ursula the paparazzi manwhore.

You’re Welcome.

 

 

 

Copyright © 2017 Charlie Zero the Poet

All rights Reserved.

No part of Lamas Dipped in Vagisil & Amish – may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means: electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without prior permission. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Charlie Zero the Poet and his poetry works with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Advertisements

Midget Fabio Rehearsed Oreo Threesomes

 

Hey! Midget Fabio
you two timing rap podiatrist –
explain how Captain Spaulding
got cone holes shaped
like Kiefer Sutherland’s womanhood.

Bill Nye stop plagiarizing
telegraphs and wear something taco,
try chicken catheters or guacamole rhymes.
They make great concoctions
of elevating legs, bitching,
& Mark Wahlberg.

Katy Perry neglect McDonald’s
focus more on Oreo threesomes.
You get half price deals
off Ricky Martin & Joanie loves Chachi.

Trust me…Morgan freeman
rehearsed every line to ‘oops I blew it again’.
And by that he meant; tuna casserole.

 

 

Copyright © 2017 Charlie Zero the Poet

All rights Reserved.

No part of Midget Fabio Rehearsed Oreo Threesomes – may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means: electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without prior permission. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Charlie Zero the Poet and his poetry works with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Topless Hamsters of Popcorn Foreplay

 

Mcfly you’re smarter
than Fran drescher
leave the pluming duties to Jesus.
After all – eddy murphy
sought custody of Kevin bacon
and Weird Al Yankovic.

Tom Petty carried
a dozen yoga mats,
fully realizing a giant sourdough crust.
With every non-dairy urinal,
you regain popcorn immunities
resembling fruit roll ups.
Talk about immigration foreplay.

Socks placenta
during tattoo barber shops,
feed them disco feminist retainers –
and you’ll receive a cramp
the size of a topless hamster.
Matthew Mcconaughey
even agreed tofu anus donuts
against his own pancreas –
should never squeeze
the watermelons of Saddam Hussein.

I smell a lawsuit…
well, add some ground pepper,
shoelaces, playboy magazines,
& Jon Bon Jovi, you’ll be good.

 

 

 

Copyright © 2017 Charlie Zero the Poet

All rights Reserved.

No part of Topless Hamsters of Popcorn Foreplay – may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means: electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without prior permission. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Charlie Zero the Poet and his poetry works with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Lucille Ball Crucifies Ice Cream and Karma Sutras Zombie Wizards

 

My name is beavis
I cook for Hitler’s Volkswagen –
Spielberg handles the ice cream,
Mel Gibson crucifies Lettuce.
Prayer gives you Howard Sterns,
like Madonna sex changing
into her gift reward card.

Hello, Paula Deen –
care for some racist butter?
Yes! And may Alec Baldwin
continue giving me bj’s –
so zombie wizards and George Clooney
can co-exist in economical bourbon.

Think physics before
solving macadamia salty nuts.
Arby’s & FBI
put grapes on 9/11
using karma sutra
as brochures to Disneyland adventure.

Lucille Ball, finally!
You own Frances Coppola’s peppermint stick.
Life is a piece of cumberbatch.
There’s no telling how the CIA
could ever out run, a pancake mixer.

 

 

 

 

Copyright © 2017 Charlie Zero the Poet

All rights Reserved.

No part of Lucille Ball Crucifies Ice Cream and Karma Sutras Zombie Wizards – may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means: electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without prior permission. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Charlie Zero the Poet and his poetry works with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Marlon Brando Prophesied Satan’s Anti-aging Testicle Juice

 

I’m tired of hipster beards
living off gypsies & artsy fartsy.
Johnnie Cochran paraphrased it:

“Flop at the box office,
or drink martini juice.”

A famous quote by: Testicle Namaste.

Marlon Brando
coined the term: “Science”
back in the 1700s. How?
He mumbled gibberish
prophesies that entailed; Nazi hairdryers,
DMV chlamydia, & cub scout illuminati.

Oh! So, you’re saying;
yeast infections we’re part
of an elaborate John Travolta
to further their anti-aging bird shit?
Yep, slaveantology
imprisons 7-UP.
They know if you consume it –
it’ll make mick jagger feel horny again.

Gene Simmons…
you trademarked Satan’s abs?
No wonder your soul
is half gazpacho & half psoriasis.
And speaking of Toys ‘r’ us…
How’s life treating you in Barcelona?
Hopefully, soapy and, aunt jemima free…

 

 

 

Copyright © 2017 Charlie Zero the Poet

All rights Reserved.

No part of Marlon Brando Prophesied Satan’s Anti-aging Testicle Juice – may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means: electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without prior permission. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Charlie Zero the Poet and his poetry works with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Horoscope Bras and Jamaican Ovaries

 

Ashton Kushner,
you Barbra Streisand
looking mother-budweiser.
Why deny the brown stains
in your briefs?
Take Imodium
and hold Pepe Le Pew’s hand;
if you sense hot flashes
then it’s obviously your Hiroshima.
Stop crying Will Ferrell –
you’ll only sound Jamaican.

Pay close attention
to your Christmas ovaries.
They’ll jingle dodge ball hymns
through Rodney Dangerfield’s eyes.

Notice how Venezuela
plucked out UFO rhinos
from Marisa Tomei’s Armani.
Yeah, and Eminem
wears a horoscope bra
just so he can idolize scrambled eggs.

Watch yourself Garth Algar –
I’m doing the catwalk
working my pecs
and fixing myself a chilidog.
(Grrrr…grrr…) Stomach growling –
the noises inside indicate
a war between cocoa pecan butter,
and John Wayne Gacy’s T.V. guide.

 

 

 

Copyright © 2017 Charlie Zero the Poet

All rights Reserved.

No part of Horoscope Bras and Jamaican Ovaries – may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means: electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without prior permission. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Charlie Zero the Poet and his poetry works with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

John Doe’s Ticket Disembodied Semen Part 3

 

And now the conclusion drips.

I am sibyl! The vengeful disembodied.

Babalon…we open ourselves to you.
An inauguration of your warm semen –
inside our ticket initiated rocket.

Mojave Desert – hear the wailing banshee conceive.

Its sonic screams: Antiuschristos orgy.

She licks enochian oath,
she taboos ruthless oral.

Ostium, must obsidian corks caryatid the near?

Papa’s omenootus! Papa’s omenootus! Papa’s omenootus!

 

 

 

 

Copyright © 2017 Charlie Zero the Poet

All rights Reserved.

No part of John Doe’s Ticket Disembodied Semen Part 3 – may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means: electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without prior permission. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Charlie Zero the Poet and his poetry works with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.