Tearing Metaphors is the Sexiest Trick in Periphery

 

Tearing loopholes
and rearranging periphery.
Pull out the metaphor clozaril.
Unetonalters clomp;
macaw mitre depatterns
the berefleetirpor litotes.

Antithesis liars
sip a glocal exit.

Hyperbole lickspittles
the bare trick
of his notion coccyx rip-off.

Lumbosacral threshes away –
leaving the sexiest gazeless
up in the outwit daymare.

You became the chilling malice…
come and kneel, the catechisms bled regicide.

 

 

Copyright © 2017 Charlie Zero the Poet

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Satirical Sardines and the Weird Nobody Gasm

 

Dear satirical girls
press exaggeration button –
it matters whether
the dictionaries gasm
or, stick to HBO.
Embody soused,
vitriol gneiss, coerce iniquity –
Mr. nobody weird regains jealousy spit.

Parody beings
dismember six
with your awkward toe.
Subpoena punctuations –
cerecloth arrhizal,
sandwich bikinis commit perjury
and impugn such relevancy.

Motion to suppress
you may not proceed
as the sardines tic;
encircling aegis,
tames the satyr,
whom famously profound
the icky token pomade.

Teasing turds
reveal thereof…
like blue hedgefonds
pointing diagonally.

Take a biopsy
fist inside the pussy controversy…
its pink like monkey, fights unpredictably –
I’m a transqueer speaking to my moist.

Oh! My goodness,
look at this uncanny Hasselhoff?
I mean…what on earth
did spook the blemish dramas?
Certainly not VHS…

Chipped ominous –
brushed onward by pilchards.
Bones & disturbing buffoonery,
exactly what constitutes
garbage flamingos & avocado condoms?
Laserdisc omens, infecting 2, 1, 5…

~ Sincerely Principle Cesspool the Carrotologist

 

 

 

Copyright © 2017 Charlie Zero the Poet

All rights Reserved.

No part of Satirical Sardines and the Weird Nobody Gasm – may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means: electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without prior permission. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Charlie Zero the Poet and his poetry works with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Above the Insects Who Peel the Sirens Odor

 

Squeal monotones
heed without above.

Silkworm adults quickly
translucent in 3D proventriculus,

Open yourself thoroughly.
My head navigates
through the insect series.
What tarn decayed
this willful hiccup?

Hemolymph oars
alarm the kodacolor.
Melpomene odor
snellens in Paleozoic,

Breathe…the Ohmolick sprites.

Armscye lunula,
balladry of hyssop –
spread loathe onto
eschaton martyrdom.

Holotech pounding,
peel the tinnitus.
Cenozoic sirens
theatric all asleep,
chide puns
shineless darkle –
my unbelievable costume
crucified near the perplex belaud.

 

 

Copyright © 2017 Charlie Zero the Poet

All rights Reserved.

No part of Above the Insects Who Peel the Sirens Odor – may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means: electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without prior permission. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Charlie Zero the Poet and his poetry works with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Lamas Dipped in Vagisil & Amish

 

Harpo Marx used a pizza wagon
to lure Ariel, John Hinckley,
& Lamas.
He takes them home
for soup recipes
and creates a dipping sauce
called: “Vagisil & Amish.”
Cosmo Kramer
you penny pincher scallop –
make love to the wall pervert.
Macaulay Culkin
does impressions
of KFC & Jheri curls.
Just ask Mariah Carey –
she’s a marine rectumologist,
she’s Danny DeVito’s pacifier.

Raphael wiggum,
are you rabieist? No!
Good, because imitating
Tupac Shakur is considered bronchitis.
Pineapples & Sharon Tate
tough to choose, I’ll pick…

Meredith brooks vs. Cinnamon toast crunch.
I’d love to see a Dave Chappelle skit –
involving Sammy Davis Jr. as Doctor Satan the pimp
and Mickey Rourke as Ursula the paparazzi manwhore.

You’re Welcome.

 

 

 

Copyright © 2017 Charlie Zero the Poet

All rights Reserved.

No part of Lamas Dipped in Vagisil & Amish – may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means: electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without prior permission. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Charlie Zero the Poet and his poetry works with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Midget Fabio Rehearsed Oreo Threesomes

 

Hey! Midget Fabio
you two timing rap podiatrist –
explain how Captain Spaulding
got cone holes shaped
like Kiefer Sutherland’s womanhood.

Bill Nye stop plagiarizing
telegraphs and wear something taco,
try chicken catheters or guacamole rhymes.
They make great concoctions
of elevating legs, bitching,
& Mark Wahlberg.

Katy Perry neglect McDonald’s
focus more on Oreo threesomes.
You get half price deals
off Ricky Martin & Joanie loves Chachi.

Trust me…Morgan freeman
rehearsed every line to ‘oops I blew it again’.
And by that he meant; tuna casserole.

 

 

Copyright © 2017 Charlie Zero the Poet

All rights Reserved.

No part of Midget Fabio Rehearsed Oreo Threesomes – may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means: electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without prior permission. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Charlie Zero the Poet and his poetry works with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Topless Hamsters of Popcorn Foreplay

 

Mcfly you’re smarter
than Fran drescher
leave the pluming duties to Jesus.
After all – eddy murphy
sought custody of Kevin bacon
and Weird Al Yankovic.

Tom Petty carried
a dozen yoga mats,
fully realizing a giant sourdough crust.
With every non-dairy urinal,
you regain popcorn immunities
resembling fruit roll ups.
Talk about immigration foreplay.

Socks placenta
during tattoo barber shops,
feed them disco feminist retainers –
and you’ll receive a cramp
the size of a topless hamster.
Matthew Mcconaughey
even agreed tofu anus donuts
against his own pancreas –
should never squeeze
the watermelons of Saddam Hussein.

I smell a lawsuit…
well, add some ground pepper,
shoelaces, playboy magazines,
& Jon Bon Jovi, you’ll be good.

 

 

 

Copyright © 2017 Charlie Zero the Poet

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No part of Topless Hamsters of Popcorn Foreplay – may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means: electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without prior permission. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Charlie Zero the Poet and his poetry works with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Lucille Ball Crucifies Ice Cream and Karma Sutras Zombie Wizards

 

My name is beavis
I cook for Hitler’s Volkswagen –
Spielberg handles the ice cream,
Mel Gibson crucifies Lettuce.
Prayer gives you Howard Sterns,
like Madonna sex changing
into her gift reward card.

Hello, Paula Deen –
care for some racist butter?
Yes! And may Alec Baldwin
continue giving me bj’s –
so zombie wizards and George Clooney
can co-exist in economical bourbon.

Think physics before
solving macadamia salty nuts.
Arby’s & FBI
put grapes on 9/11
using karma sutra
as brochures to Disneyland adventure.

Lucille Ball, finally!
You own Frances Coppola’s peppermint stick.
Life is a piece of cumberbatch.
There’s no telling how the CIA
could ever out run, a pancake mixer.

 

 

 

 

Copyright © 2017 Charlie Zero the Poet

All rights Reserved.

No part of Lucille Ball Crucifies Ice Cream and Karma Sutras Zombie Wizards – may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means: electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without prior permission. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Charlie Zero the Poet and his poetry works with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.